Haters’ Ball

Two thousand people gathered in Boston to rally in favor of hatred and discrimination.

Does that sound like an unfairly harsh way to describe the anti-gay marriage rally in Boston today, sponsored by the Archdiocese of Boston? If so, why?

Is it unreasonable to be skeptical of remarks like this?

“We are not here for hate-mongering,” O’Malley said. “We are here because we are concerned about marriage and about family … The court’s decision would have an enormously negative impact on our society. (These justices) have overstepped their authority.”


There are times when I wonder if we lose something of ourselves by not calling things what they are. Do we give people a pass they don’t deserve, because they are able to hide behind their religious beliefs? When people gather for the express purpose of denying equality to another group of people, what else can we call it but hate?

From a religious perspective, is it really possible to love someone that you don’t see as an equal? Is it possible to see someone as less than equal without hatred, or without at least contempt? If so, how?

From my perspective, either you see me as equal or you don’t. If you don’t, as far as I’m concerned it amounts to hate – and the actions taken to maintain inequality stem from hatred. I don’t care if it’s for religious reasons. If you can’t see me as equal – and treat me as equal – then you have to see me as (even slightly) less than human. You can’t really see me as equal and still deny me equal treatment. That’s called having your cake and eating it too.

I’ve heard all I can stand of “love the sinner, hate the sin.” My gayness is not what I do. It’s a part of who I am – who I’ve always been. It’s what I feel – have always felt – in my heart. Even if I became celibate (giving up my partner and my son), I would still be the same gay person. I would still feel the same in my heart.

My gayness is not something I do. It’s part of who I am, and what is in my heart. Hate it, and you hate who I am. You hate what is in my heart. You hate me.

It’s that simple. Isn’t it?

What might it be like if they gay family members, friends, coworkers and neighbors of those 2,000 hate-filled people came out, and confronted them tomorrow and simply asked “Why do you hate me so much?”

This entry was posted in Gay Rights. Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to Haters’ Ball

  1. Katharine says:

    Written with every bit of passion and eloquence I’ve seen from you at the lectern, my friend. Well said.

  2. chris says:

    I agree Katherine.

    I think the animosity surronding this issue is a combination of bigotry and the loss of marital desision making that the parents, community, and church have over their children. A constitutional amendment banning gay marriage is a last grasp at traditional church and community approved marriage.

  3. trey says:

    You’ve said it very well. I’ve tried hard to not believe that those against gay marriage are bigots…

    but the more I hear their rhetoric and the more I read their equations of gay=pedophile and gay=disease ridden and gay=pervert, the more I realize they actually and truely hate us and view us as vermin. One need only to read a few words on the Family Research Council or Focus on Family or all the other so-called pro-family organizations to see that.

    they don’t like to be called hateful and bigots, but I’m coming to the conclusion that if it walks like a duck…

  4. ej says:

    That was well, well, well put. My thoughts exactly!

  5. Pingback: Daddy, Papa & Me

Comments are closed.