Kids Today

I wasn’t gonna post any more this evening, but we just got home and I had a sort of positive story I wanted to tell.

This afternoon, we went to a pool party/cook-out for gay dads and their families. Most of the kids there were the eight-and-under set, except for three teenagers. Two were, a boy and a girl, were the children of the hosts. The third, a 15 year old boy, was the daughter’s best friend. One of the hosts told us that the best friend was gay. Not only that, but he was out to his parents and they were very supportive. 

I thought for a minute about how great it was for this kid that he was able to be out at 15 and have his parents’ support. And then I realized, he was also having an opportunity to see gay men with families, and to see parenthood as a viable option for his future. Of course, none of us there had any intention of serving as role models. We were just happy to have a chance to get our kids out of the house. But in a way we were serving as role models of a sort for this young man, or at least as examples of one of the many options open to him.

Of course, I wondered what things might have been like for me if I’d been able to see and experience that when I was 15, but things turned out pretty well for me anwyay. The 80s, when I came out, were a very different time, and there were few if any gay role models available. I had to go looking for them in books for the most part. Kids today have everyday role models within arms reach. That struck me as a good thing, and I felt like maybe, by being out and daring to build a family together we have a role to play in that — just by living our lives openly and honestly.

That put a smile on my face for the rest of the afternoon. I don’t know what the kid at the party thought about  what he was seeing — though he seemed to enjoy the children running around –  but at least its a choice that’s available to  him. That, in and of itself, is a sign of amazing progress.